Taking care of a human being, or even helping a person take care of themselves, is a heavy burden to bear. To be clear, the person is not the burden, but being responsible for their safety and well-being is taxing, and if you never get relief or a break from that duty, the stress can quickly start to pile up.

 

In much the same way parents occasionally need to enlist the help of a babysitter, or a teacher needs to bring in a substitute in order to use PTO, no one providing support or care services to an elderly individual should be expected to do so indefinitely without some kind of reprieve. Without some way to help them shoulder the burden, caregivers will eventually spiral into burnout. 

 

Providing care is challenging enough on its own, but it becomes even more difficult when your physical, emotional, and mental reserves have been wholly depleted. In other words, in order to properly care for your charge, you’ll need to also care for yourself.

 

What Is Caregiver Burnout?

 

Caregiver burnout is a term that describes a state of physical, emotional, and mental distress that results from the intense demands of providing care, over a lengthy timeframe, with few (if any) breaks in bearing those responsibilities. When we have to be the one on duty and on alert at all times, it can quickly become apparent how critical downtime is to our well being. 

 

More importantly, burdens and stressors we could normally carry with little issue quickly begin to compound the longer they are carried without being put down. 

 

In essence, burnout is what we experience when we push ourselves to be “on the clock” for most of our waking hours, over an extended period, until the combined strain of physical exertion, mental labor, and emotional demand becomes too much for us to bear. Caregiver burnout is somewhat unique in that it can happen much faster than other forms of burnout, and when it does, it impacts both the individual and those that depend on them for care. 

 

From a certain perspective, burnout is an early warning system. The same way many mechanical and digital hardware systems will shut themselves down when the internal temperature gets too high, the dramatic dropoff in our ability to meet obligations is an indication that what we’ve been doing up until that point is unsustainable, and that we need something to change. 

 

Common Signs and Symptoms of Burnout

 

“Burnout” as a category of mental and physical exhaustion is still undergoing research in the medical field. What counts as burnout, and what circumstances can produce the official condition isn’t fully determined yet. 

 

But when an otherwise disorder-free individual begins exhibiting symptoms that are consistent with conditions like depression, anxiety, and other serious mental health diagnoses, it’s hard to argue that what they’re experiencing can be fixed with a quick nap. As a result, at least in circumstances related to providing care, this kind of “burnout” is sometimes referred to as “caregiver stress.” 

 

In situations where burnout is officially recognized, it involves symptoms and characteristics like the following:

 

  • Increased levels and frequency of worry, anxiety, panic, and dread.
  • Ongoing feelings of exhaustion, drowsiness, and weariness, usually without improving after rest.
  • Disruption of regular sleep patterns (sleeping much more/much less than normal).
  • Increased irritability, reduced patience, and decreased resilience toward formerly tolerable stress factors.
  • Changes/fluctuations in weight, appetite, energy levels, and decreased motivation or interest in formerly enjoyed activities.
  • Difficulty concentrating.
  • Getting sick more frequently than normal.

 

All of these are symptoms that a caregiver might feel when overtaxed and overworked. Burnout/caregiver stress like this can often lead to experiencing a sense of hopelessness, and even resentment toward the patient themselves. 

 

Causes of Caregiver Stress and Fatigue

 

Humans tend to be fairly resilient creatures, and we can endure quite a bit of hardship or difficulty before we finally throw in the towel. If people can run marathons, or undergo grueling physical training for weeks at a time, or even suffer through the same soul-crushing job for years, how does burnout even happen in the first place?

 

This is an important question, in part because answering it helps us identify the factors that turn something from a bearable burden to a crushing weight. 

 

Caregiving involves many of the same stress factors you’ll find elsewhere:

 

  • Manual labor and physical exertion
  • Not getting enough sleep/only getting poor quality, broken sleep
  • Mental load and decision fatigue
  • Long shifts with minimal downtime or breaks
  • Long periods between “days off”

 

Add to that some of the concerns that often an unavoidable part of caring for an aging loved one:

 

  • The emotional impact of having interpersonal dynamics upended, such as when an adult child becomes the caregiver for an elderly parent
  • Trying to maintain a patient and calm demeanor, even when the individual being cared for acts erratically or unpredictably
  • External constraints, such as limited finances, preexisting commitments to others (e.g. a boss, spouse, kids, or other relationships), scheduling conflicts and logistical concerns, etc.
  • The expectation (sometimes self-imposed) that the burden of providing care is yours, and yours alone

 

Even at this point, these largely equate to other roles an adult might fill at some point, be it raising their own children, participating in a charity/nonprofit organization, investing in a hobby or self-care interest, and more. These are legitimate struggles for certain, and burnout can happen as a result of these factors in almost any setting. 

 

What tends to amplify the stress factors well beyond the point of no return are a few details that are rarely seen in any other type of responsibility:

 

  • Unlike caring for children, it is often neither feasible nor appropriate to bring the patient along to take care of some of your other responsibilities and errands.
  • Unlike a professional role, caregivers often feel like they fell into the responsibility by accident, and thus lack the proper skills and training.
  • Unlike most adult responsibilities, caregivers often have to be available to see to the patient’s needs around the clock. In some cases, that can mean no weekends or off shifts, and no holidays or vacation days.
  • And perhaps most importantly, providing senior care often includes a sense of ambiguity and lack of control. You don’t feel like you can walk away (i.e. “quit”) if it becomes too much, and the length of the commitment is functionally indefinite. 

 

The Impact of Burnout on Caregivers’ Health

 

When you’re doing difficult work, for long hours, with no breaks, and you don’t know when you’ll be done, that’s when the hopelessness begins to set in. If we have an end point, a finish line, or a way out, we can often push through. But without those options and emotional landmarks, it’s completely normal to wind up feeling lost. 

 

It’s more than that, though. This kind of “endurance test” can lead to some pretty significant problems:

 

  • Any kind of prolonged exertion tends to result in a less robust immune response and higher odds of infectious illness and developing noninfectious diseases (e.g. heart disease).
  • The mental and emotional strain can elevate the risk of psychological disorders even if you’ve never experienced them before (and have no family history of those conditions). For those who have dealt with depression, anxiety, and similar struggles, burnout compounds both the likelihood and intensity. 
  • The long hours and manual labor can lead to increased risk of injury—everything from things like repetitive motion tasks, to accidents resulting from slow reaction times and drowsiness. 
  • More indirectly, filling a caregiver role can have knock-on effects, where you ignore your own needs and delay your own care (not getting regular medical and dental checkups, downplaying symptoms, neglecting personal efforts to maintain hygiene and physical health, etc.)
  • When the stress becomes severe enough some caregivers—feeling trapped and desperate for some form of relief—may begin to lean on unhealthy coping strategies such as substance abuse, behavioral addictions (i.e. gambling), revenge bedtime procrastination, etc.

 

Emotionally, the caregiver can feel helpless, overwhelmed, unappreciated, forgotten, angry (at the patient or at others for not providing more support), and in some cases, even at risk of self-harm. 

 

What begins as an effort to ease the discomfort of a loved one in need can quickly start to feel like a form of social parasitism—even when we acknowledge intellectually that neither party intended for it to end up like this. 

 

How to Prevent and Manage Caregiver Burnout

 

Burnout isn’t a guarantee, and it’s not a condition that can’t be treated. There are strategies for getting ahead of burnout or addressing it if things get that far. 

 

Above all, though, is this piece of advice: this is not a burden that’s meant to be carried alone. Your situation will have its unique challenges, but whatever limitations or hurdles you face, don’t resign yourself to serve as caregiver completely devoid of external support. 

 

As for what kind of support and where to find it, we have a few suggestions:

 

  • Helping hands—don’t be afraid to ask friends and family for assistance, and lean on them where you can. Even if what you arrange is an afternoon where you can be “off-duty” once every month, it’s likely more than what you’ve been getting.
  • Build an emotional support network—beyond direct assistance in providing care, you’re probably going to need people you can talk to, and places you can go to ask for advice. Caregiving resources and classes can help you skill up. Support groups can give you a safe place to share frustrations (and victories). Therapy can aid you with more targeted efforts to manage stress and burnout, and connect you with other forms of treatment when needed. And your close social circle can be there, too, even when they can’t assist with the labor. 
  • Check in with healthcare professionals—it’s shockingly easy to do, but don’t allow your focus on providing care to them result in you failing to monitor your own well being. Make appointments, and don’t skip them, even if they feel unnecessary. 

 

We’d also be remiss if we didn’t provide some tips on how to look out for the people providing care, both to the patient, and to you:

 

  • Establish clear expectations—with everyone who’s involved with these matters, be direct and explicit so there’s no confusion. People are more willing to provide support if they know the scope of their commitment, and you can more effectively communicate your level of need if they can see how much you’re currently doing alone.
  • Distribute the weight—just as you can’t be expected to do it all alone, it’s good practice to have more than one go-to when you need urgent support. In fact, by breaking up the needs by urgency, intensity, duration, etc., and making a list of people you can lean on, you can ensure that when the situation is absolutely dire, your #1 supporter is at full strength when you call. 
  • Set goals, get organized, be strategic—so much of our responsibilities are overwhelming in part because we look at them in totality. A sink full of dirty dishes can be terrifying, but telling yourself “I’m only washing the cups and plates” can make it surprisingly bearable. So plan things out, break duties down into smaller components, and tap your support crew when you need to assign individual pieces to save your own sanity. 
  • Look after yourself—forgive us for the blunt phrasing, but you can only provide care if you’re not also bedridden personally. So do what you can to keep your tank filled up. Sleep, eat, and follow your hygiene habits as best you can (and work to improve them from there). Get help when needed so you can cover the bare minimum, then start finding ways to do that in order to win back some of your personal time. Despite the name, “recreation” isn’t as optional as we’d like to think, especially when burnout is on the table. You might even go so far as to appoint an accountability partner who can help you keep tabs on yourself. 


Now, we’ve saved the best for last, both because it’s the most intimidating from a financial perspective, and because we’ve dedicated most of the end of this article to it. But there are services if what you need is a “substitute teacher,” but for providing care to a loved one. It’s called Respite Care, and it comes in a few varieties.

 

Even with respite care, you’ll likely still need to have or find other, more ongoing arrangements to make things livable. But you might be surprised how much good a single weekend away from your normal responsibilities can do. 

 

When to Seek Professional Help

 

At the end of the day, there is only so much that one person can do, let alone someone who’s not a healthcare professional at their day job. Be willing to recognize and admit when you’ve reached your limit, and when you need help beyond just a few hours off. 

 

For one-off or occasional support from professionals, consider respite care. Depending on where you live, there are options for by-the-hour or single-day service, adult care centers, in-home respite, short-term nursing homes, and more. Rates will vary, and what’s most affordable may change depending on how long you need the service to be. 

 

For more regular support, you might look into having part-time in-home care. Rather than be on duty 24/7, or paying someone else to be, you can split the difference, so you only have to handle caregiving for part of the time. 

 

And if you need it, there are options for long-term care, both in-home and at a facility. There are even support and assistance programs for those who are struggling to cover costs like those—the most widely used being Medicaid Long-Term Care. 

 

If, at any point, you feel like you aren’t going to be able to handle it all yourself, but aren’t sure what else to do, don’t assume you’re out of options. Ask around, do some research, and see if there isn’t something you missed, or something that’s become relevant only recently. 

 

Your loved one may need care and support, but so do you. It’s best for both of you if you don’t go without. 

 

We at Inhomecare.com hope to help you and your loved ones. Visit our site and take the first step toward a safer, more independent future today!